Taco De Mayo

I have a problem.

I only start blogging a lot when school holidays are about to come to an end, like a sandwich, I only start blogging when I am in the peanut butter and jelly part of the PB&J Sandwich which is delicious and ranks only second next to Club Sandwich or whatever sandwich with a generous amount of meant inside (Bacon is my favorite, in fact I love bacon so much I'm gonna call my kid Bacon, and when he grows up he will sell bacon, and eat bacon all day... and die a happy obese boy when he reaches 2 years old )

And you thought I had a real problem... Pfft~!...

Having very few friends is not a problem.

Hardly going out is not a problem.

Being extremely skinny is not a problem.

STOP JUDGING ME!

I had Mexican Food for dinner today... now that's a problem.

I ordered the soft taco with side serving of beef, guacamole, sour cream, some salad salsa combination and a LOT of foul yellow thing people call cheese which they consume and say is delicious even though it smells like concentrated sweat : Just Add Water!.

Being the lazy person that I am, I pictured a nicely done Taco served to my table....

Something like this...

Mmmm.... Gorgeous, all I had to do was just to open my mouth and stick the taco in slowly while my jaws moved up and down at a constant speed.



But instead... what I saw was a small little ceramic pot with 3 pieces of tacos wraps, along with a plate of all the filling...

Like this, but without the hand.

And I was so upset, I called the waitress over, asked her to go into the kitchen and MAKE ME A SAMMICH! She got pissed and shot me in the head with her Mexican gun, she was fired and I am now buried in the cemetry located at Sarcarsm Drive across TheSexistPig Road.


I had to make the Taco myself, and I had a lot of beef, the yellow mass of concentrated sweat was left untouch, and so was the sour cream. Sour Cream and Concentrated Sweat.... really? In a Taco? Mexicans...typical.


Well the beef was extremely filling, and it was only a small ramekin of beef. I couldn't really taste the guacamole, it's like this flavorless slimmy fruit I guess, and the Mexicans aren't proud of it because it no stinko de mayo.


It was a nice dinner though, I'm so sick of Chinese food. Urghhh~
"It's healthy and delicous" is what Nigella Lawson said about Chinese Food, but what she doesn't understand is "Healthy" and "Delicious" don't go hand in hand... that's why I am still single because I am wayyy to healthy its nauseating just to look at me.


People usually go for the "Delicious" type, which is why they either get pregnant with a bastard child or get some sort of STD later on in life. I'm just telling the truth, the bitter bitter truth... Gosh it's so bitter.... so bitter, My Gosh I am so bitter.


Well, Guess now it's time to head to the toilet and cry.

Chocolate Peanut Butter.

Reese Peanut Buttercups.

Probably the best chocolate I've ever had. Peanut Butter and Chocolate is a fantastic combination, and this fantastic combination is not easy to find, like how hard it is to find an uber awesome weapon in Aion or Wally or a Needle in a Haystack because apparently needles cost a bomb. My method is to not sew in a barn with a load of haystack laying around... or stop having sex in the barn and mess up the haystack and instead of smoking a ciggy, takes out a torn clothe and start sewing. Rough sex... tearing. I just made the connection for you.

Orgasm,Orgasm,Orgasm

A few weeks back, or I think it was a few weeks back because the holiday has made me lose track of time,my Mum was able to get her hands on a packet of it in Universal Studios Hershey Choclate Heaven or whatever the shop is called. A pity she only bought one packet because it was meant to be shared and being in a desperate need for an orgasm Reese Peanut Buttercup after finding out that Candy Empire doesn't sell em, I had to get my hands on as much of it as possible, which I did.


I have to say my self control was pretty good because the packet of chocolate lasted for 4 days or so... with my other family members eating it as well. If they didn't it would've probably lasted 4.5 days.... and if I wasn't involve in the candy binge that I am suffering from... probably would've lasted for 4 weeks.




Googled KOI Bubble Tea and came across this one blog... read through the blog (read: browsing through photographs of food taken by a blogger who doesn't know how to use Macro.) And I saw the blogger talking about Reese Peanut Buttercup. Cacao Tree sells the candy.

CACAO TREE SELLS REESE PEANUT BUTTERCUP!

And now is the time to go and look for which Cacao Tree shop actually sells it because I am not going to Unviersal Studios just to get the candy unless I am going Cold Turkey on candy and I am failing because I am as addicted to candy as a hooker is to genital warts.

Forms

I'm suppose to have handed in my NS Information but I can't really be bothered to. At this point, I'm really tempted to just tell the Army I'm gay and just get out of all the Army marching and torturing and just jump straight to getting my ass raped.

"Time to lose your virginity Soldier!"

Another thing that I have coming up is to write on Essay to the lecturers on why I deserve the title of "Hoebag of the Year"

".... Because I am a slut DOH!"

Actually I have to write an essay to convince the lecturers on why I deserve the to be chosen for one of the three projects I have chosen for the Final Year Project, I have to prove my worth through the power of my words.

300 words on why I want a project, whose brief I have read through and do not understand at all. Well I got the gist of it, which I am pretty sure is not 100% accurate because the lecturers decided to use profound English words that people wouldn't use in their daily life.

Words like "Genius Loci".... which I thought meant Genius , but after checking with my friend, turns out to be a whole other thing... instead of Googling "Loci", my friend Googled "Genius Loci" which gave him the proper meaning.

And the proper meaning is.... I have no idea what the actual meaning is because as it turns out, it's like a guardian of sorts.

????So now the whole idea is to create a guardian of sorts to protect a building????

I am gonna put that as my second choice for the project, and when I get it, I will probably get real excited at first because it's all new and unknown and adventurous, and then feel really screwed as I progress along like I do with all my other projects after getting worn out by the lecturers with their amazing, indirect ideas.

School is starting in a week... hoping for a new table and chair arrangement and sitting at a different spot surrounded by different people.

Digression

I've really been craving to bake a cake for months now, but have just been way to lazy to go out to buy the ingredients, or to go out at all really.

All the cake recipes on Youtube that I am so tempted to make, but having to go out and buy the ingredients from the Supermarket and carry everything all the way back is not what I plan to do, which is really sad because I could use a little sunshine on my pale white skin.

Really now I just want to bake to prove to myself that what someone said a long time ago was wrong.

I told that person I wanted to enroll into cooking school in the future, he decides to tell other people later that day... after which he decides to insult my cooking abilities in front of a group of people. You don't get a better friend than that do you. That's just one of the many nice things he has done to me.

(Please get the sarcasm, I feel like I have to disclaimer this part because I F*CKING hate that guy)

So I might actually go out soon to get some ingredients for the bake off, and if I do I will probably document my steps and take gorgeous pictures to post on this blog like how every other bloggers do. I enjoy looking at pictures of food, I don't know why some people find it stupid when you put pictures of food up on your blog, I like it, I dig that, sticking pictures of food on your blog... sometimes it turns me on so much I use it to to.....*cough*

Of course I only enjoy the pictures taken by people who actually know how to use the macro function on their camera, it's that little icon that looks like a flower, you can touch it, it won't make your camera explode... and also I would much prefer if they didn't have last minute parkinson shots which causes all their pictures to look like an earthquake just happened and YOU did not hide under the table, but instead took a fuzzy shot of your Grilled Chicken Sandwich and decides to put it on your blog later and call it...

"So much better than John's Grilled Lamb Vegetarian Salad"

Oh, the irony. John's Grilled Lamb Vegetarian Salad looks so much better than your Grilled Chicken Salad that survived an Earthquake, although I'm guessing the Bhuddist Monks won't be too please that the Vegetarian Salad has something that will shake them to their core that is the wonderful and delicious Lamb grilled by John.

Wish I was called John, maybe I should use that as an alias because it's so much easier to say when the Starbuck's counter person ask for my name. I think I'm gonna tell strangers that I am called John from now on, John, John Doe, and when I become friends with them then will I reveal my real name and that will be the twist to the film that's based around my life called "The Life Of John".

As you can probably tell from the post, my mind is starting to really drift off somewhere else, so I'm gonna stop lest it wonders even further and I get lost in my own thoughts forever... which will be how "The Life Of John" ends.

"Forgive me Father for I have sin. It's been 23 days since my last Tweet"

I'm probably gonna stop twitting for a while, until Twitter can create a proper "Block" system so I can block someone. It would be nice if they had a "banish" command, I will create multiple accounts and banish that person to twitter damnation for twitting politcally incorrect stuff that isn't funny...

You aren't Seth Macfarlene! Nothing politically incorrect that you Tweet, Facebook or laugh stupidly before saying it because you think you are Oh so Hilarious will ever be politically correct.

Dentistry

Visting the dentist is probably something I will never stop fearing.


Oral Injection isn't comforting for me because I can't see the needle going through the skin, or in this case, the gum. I will never get why people don't want to look at the needle going in, for me, seeing the needle go through prepares me... and then I get turn on because the pain is sooo good.


Drilling is okay, until the drill hits the sensitive part and starts drilling even deeper because OMG! There's Oil underneath!

Drilling the sensitve part and feeling the "pain" is something no numbing cream or anesthesia injection will fix, I really want to try the laughing gas thing, only worry is that when I am high, I might start spilling sensitive information, and that's something the Russian Governemnt won't be too happy about.

¡No soy un Espía ruso ... dejan de preguntar!


I headed over to the dentist yesterday because there's a hole onmy teeth that's waiting to be filled. Initially I wanted to fix a single cavity that I was very sure existed because its on my front teeth, I knew there was another somewhere because I could feel it when I am brushing my teeth, but wasn't so sure whether it was a cavity or not, turns out the dentist found it out and decided to fill it up as well.


Early on, when the dentist first saw my teeth, he was pretty astounded because it was so gorgeous.

Dentist : "Hmmm....Your teeth is really......"

Me : "Jacked Up? Yeah"

I get that all the time when I see the dentist, I blame my Mum for backing me out from getting my braces when I was younger. Just because I was acting like a pussy doesn't mean I.... hmmm.



No, I was really scared about getting braces when I was younger because I thought what they do is they drill holes at the end of your gums and hook the braces on, who knew all they had to do was superglue metallic pieces on each of your teeth and strap a piece of wire against every metallic piece and tighten it every few months, like feet binding in China except you don't get a deformity afterwards but on the contrary become a beautiful swan.



Too bad there's NS coming up soon and doing braces now won't be a good idea because I won't have time to clean all the metal in my mouth when I am serving time... Oh that's right , apparently I did something wrong and have been sentenced to 2 years. I get paid though so I guess its no so bad, but seriosuly, I can do so much in 2 years. Gosh, Singapore, do you want to find the cure for cancer or not?


Can't wait to get braces though, I heard that when you initially get it, it sucks the life out of you by bleeding you dry but then afterwards you will start to love it, like Ash and Pikachu from Pokemon.


back to filling my teeth...

Nothing the dentist say after "Hmmm.... you teeth is..." will ever sound politcally correct because it will hurt my feelings, thus I decided to end his sentence for him.

Compared to the Malaysian dentist, this filling cost $80 per filling as compared to $25 per filling. And it's actually worth it, though not my money, becuase the filling is plastic shiny teeth colour and doesn't look like white plaster, which after some time becomes yellow... plus it feels so much smoother I can't stop licking it and acting sexy in front of this webcam channel I do on some adult website.

Turns out I have another 2 decay on the way, bloodymuthaf*cuker. All that daily Mentos, Pocky, Cadbury and Spirte did their magic, now I have 2 bloody decay on the way. Damn it, but hey, Shiny Shiny plastic filling at my Mum and Dad's expense.

Innate Ramblings

I like the title, it sounds so profound. I didn't think of that title, probably heard it or read it from somewhere else.

My laptop's been a little crazy lately, due to the fact that I've been playing Aion on it all day long. But that's a test to see whether or not you are the perfect laptop for me Acer and you've obviously failed miserably.

(Gamer language starts here...)

Damn charger stop charging midway while I was playing, I found a perfect group to do an instance with after like an hour of looking for members and the charger just stopped working. You know how hard it is to look for members in the Looking For Group channel. Bloody hell, took the group an hour to find a tank and healers and the computer stop working after that.

My laptop can be such a cunt at times.

(And gamer language stops)

If you actually understood what I was talking about, Welcome to my blog my fellow Basement Dweller

Well, I have watched the recent Glee episode and I have to say it's pretty awesome. I can never get why people would compare Glee to High School Musical.

Sure, there are similarities on why people would think they are the same type. The students break into a song and dance number whenever they have feelings that they want to express and sure, they happen to be set in a high school... but really the similarities end there, you don't put "Female Protagonist falls in love with Male Protagonist" as a similarity because otherwise all Koreans shows would be the same.

Hmmmm~ Anyway...

Whereas High School Musical sing song like "Something is going on in my heart and WTF I missed my period" written by their very own song people from whereever they find them from, Glee actually does songs that are No.1 hit somewhere sometime ago.... they don't make new songs that are filled with cliche lyrics...

It's the start of something knew~

I think I barfed when I look at you Yeah~

And now looking at the floor.

I think I just vomited lunch Ooooo~

Start of my Bulimia"

...but rather they find songs that have cliche lyrics that are No.1 hit somewhere sometime ago and sing it.

Plus, they won a few Emmy Awards, so you can't really say its a terrible show unless you have unique(<-Read Bad) taste in shows.

Although I have to say not every show or movie that has a huge fan-base is a fantastic show, look at Twilight... it's a terrible show, that's why all it has won are MTV Movie Awards that are voted by the fans themselves. Any show that goes up against Twilight in an Award show where votes are casted by fans are sure to lose out... unless Twilight is against the Bieber army, that would be a different story... maybe on par ?

Now I can't wait for the Britney episode... it's Britney Bitch... you hear me you bitch? It's Britney.

Whatever, Glee makes me listen to music I have never heard before like Britney Spears... no, I listen to Britney, hell, I was listening to Britney when I was studying for my O-Levels... when she sobbed and talked about how crappy her life was, made me feel scared and had me study even harder...I don't wanna marry a loser, and the only way to prevent that from happening is by studying and becoming smart.

Speaking of music, I am very sick of hearing people squabble about how terrible the music of the current generation is thanks to the likes of Justin Bieber, Miley Cyrus, Selena Gomez.

True, they have indeed destroyed the music industry with all their insanely brainless, self absorbed songs.

I am like a freaking fly on the wall

Paparazzi need to bloody get off my back

Feeling like a fly on the wall

I had intercourse with Daddy when I was ten (<-that is a false accusation. I hate her song but I don't hate Miley Cyrus)

Like a fly on the wall.

Kings Of Leon was once an indie band who's now starting to enter mainstream music industry, has been dissed by "fans" who feels that they are losing their style and are moving on to a different style, all because they feel the band isn't "indie" anymore.

After doing a little research, I find out that the songs that the "fans" were so pissed about was actually a song that Kings Of Leon wrote a long time ago, before they were mainstreamed, which means the music style of Kings Of Leon didn't change at all. The fans just didn't know what the hell they were talking about.

These so called "fans" are the type of people who thinks that they are cool because they are listening to music from an indie band, but because that indie band is finally going mainstream, they get pissed off because that means they are no longer cool people as their "favorite" band has gone mainstream.

I admit I actually did that once, I downloaded Kings Of Leon for that reason, and I ended up enjoying it a lot. Then I decided to listen to Radiohead.... yeah, didn't really like the latter, its still in my iPod but I'm not listening to it because I simply have no liking for it.

Kings of Leon FTW~!

Paranoid.

"Don't ever go and take a look"

That's what I tell myself in my head over and over again whenever I am tempted to see something that I know will be bad for me, like my grades... 2girls1cup.... kiddy porn.

After taking a look at whatever it is, I will just feel like crap for the rest of the day, or if it's 2girls1cup, feel scarred for life for the next few weeks... or feel afraid that parents will find me and kill me on the spot with their own collection of pornography

So today, I decided to browse something on the webby to feed my forever curious mind, and I saw something someone I know wrote, and I'm always feeling like everyone's talking about me because I like to believe the world revolves around my gravitation pull.

It's twisted because what some people say are seriously just very dark.. like..

"Sometimes when I see your face I just want to stick it into a mixer and make a face smoothie. And then I will throw that face smoothie away to show how worthless you really are."

Not directed at anyone, let me clarify. I'm not a person who thinks of dark thoughts, Smoothie isn't dark, it's healthy and nutritious and who knows, you might have a yummy face.

So after reading that, I get extremely paranoid and start thinking of what I have done to piss that person off so much.

And my train of thought will go like this....

Is it my face? Can't be my face, I look AMAZING for a 20 year old.

.

.

.

.

I gave that person a bar of chocolate just a few days ago to thank him/her for the help, I really had no idea he/she will have explosive diarrhea afterwards because of an allergic reaction.

..

..

..

..

He/she spoke to me like 2 days ago, sure we had a great talk until he/she decided to go for lunch.

...

...

...

...

That little bitch, if anyone should be pissed it should be me. He/she poured coke on my new pants a few days ago, he/she said it was an accident but I THNK NOT!

....

....

....

....

Oh.. I knew it, I knew he/she had a problem with me right from the start, he/she's been trying to sabotage me since day 1.

.....

.....

.....

.....

2 can play the same game. Wanna play "Insult the Anonymous", fine. "It's so sick to see some people's face sometimes because some people are just so sick to see."

And then the very next day, the person who wrote that dark post comes up to me and jokes with me about the post he/she wrote, and that its directed at someone else. By the way, the whole thought process that goes on usually happens within like a minute.

Then the whole process repeats when I see another similar anonymous post and I get even more paranoid. Which is why I have to discipline myself to never see other people's tweets. By other people I mean those who are always very negative and might be randomly insulting anyone. <- because such people exist in my head.